When You’re Parenting Differently Than You Were Raised
Many of us become parents determined to do things differently. We want to be more patient. More present. More attuned. Maybe we’re trying to break patterns of harsh discipline, emotional neglect, or constant chaos. Maybe we just want to feel closer to our kids than we felt to our own parents.
But parenting differently than you were raised is not just a mindset—it’s emotional labor. And it can feel lonely, exhausting, and even confusing when you’re rewriting the script in real time.
The Emotional Cost of Breaking Cycles
Changing generational patterns sounds empowering, and it can be. But it can also bring up grief, anger, and uncertainty:
Grief for the connection you didn’t get
Anger at how little support you had
Guilt when you find yourself repeating the very things you swore you wouldn’t
Fear that you’re still not “doing it right”
You may find yourself asking:
“Why is this so hard?”
“Why do I overreact to little things?”
“How do I teach my kids emotional safety when I’m still figuring it out myself?”
You’re Not Starting From Nothing—You’re Starting From Awareness
What makes you different isn’t that you have all the answers. It’s that you’re willing to ask the hard questions.
Being conscious of the patterns you want to change is already a huge step. That awareness, even when it hurts, is what opens the door to something new.
And when you mess up (because you will), you’re also modeling something many of us never saw: repair, humility, and growth.
Therapy Can Help You Hold Both: Your Past and Your Present
Trying to parent in a new way can sometimes stir up old wounds. You might feel more connected to your kids—and also more aware of what you missed out on. You might feel both proud and inadequate, sometimes in the same breath.
Therapy can help you:
Unpack your early experiences with safety and compassion
Develop tools to regulate your nervous system in the moment
Learn how to show up as the parent you want to be, even when old scripts get triggered
Find peace with being a “good enough” parent—not a perfect one
My Approach
As a therapist—and a parent—I bring both clinical skill and lived experience to this work. I understand what it means to sit with big emotions while small humans depend on you. I know how hard it is to pause and respond differently when you were never given that model yourself.
If you’re doing the work of parenting with intention, you deserve a space that honors just how much effort that takes.
You’re Not Alone in Rewriting the Story
It’s okay if this feels heavy. It’s okay if it takes time. And it’s more than okay to get support.
If you’d like a space to explore your parenting experience, heal from your past, and grow into the parent you want to be, I’m here.
📅 Schedule a free 15-minute consultation
You’re already doing something powerful by choosing to parent with awareness. Let’s build on that together.
